I work with women all the time that say to me, ‘I don’t know why I can’t get more motivated. I’m so lazy’ like a ‘lazy rut.’
You say you want to lose weight, but then you can’t motivate to meal prep.
You say you want to start your business, but then you can’t motivate to work on your business.
You say you want to find life-long love, but then you can’t find the motivation to date.
Here’s the truth.
You’re not lazy.
You’re afraid.
And it’s ok. It makes sense.
Change is super scary.
BUT, there is a way to be less afraid. And it starts with being honest about the fear.
When you’re binge-watching Lovesick instead of spending time on a dating app or out to drinks with friends on Sunday night instead of meal prepping for the week (or whatever form of distraction you personally like to employ to mask your avoidance – mine’s 100% binge-watching bad tv shows), ask yourself this:
WHY AM I AVOIDING ______________________(whatever the thing is that you’re avoiding)
WHAT AM I REALLY AFRAID OF?
Then, whatever comes up: acknowledge it.
Don’t push it right back down and say, ‘oh gosh, Mallory, that’s such a stupid fear, of course, you COULD lose weight if you would just stop being so lazy and meal prep. You’re just too lazy.’
Why? Because beating yourself up around the fear is a surefire way to let the fear continue to manifest.
Believe it or not, your fear needs a friend, not a critic. The only way to move past that fear is to know that.
Let it exist.
Acknowledge that it’s real and painful.
And then, the hardest part…
Say something nice to yourself.
That last step really is the most difficult one, but I know you can do it! Think of one nice thing to say to yourself.
Something like:
“Mallory, I know you’re afraid of failing when you diet. I know you’ve had a hard time with it in the past and so maybe you’re sabotaging yourself a little right now by avoiding meal prepping. That’s ok, it is scary. But you have done so many other hard things in your life, and you have succeeded at many other things even after you failed the first few times. If you really want this, you can do it!”
Talk to yourself the way you would talk to a friend.
Be kind.
Be accepting.
Show love.
If you think you need or deserve ‘tough love’, ask yourself, how has talking to yourself that way has served you so far?
My guess is, not so well. That’s why you’re here, after all, right?
So why not try something new? What do you have to lose?
Give this a shot – just one time
Did this resonate with you? I’d love to hear from you!
