WHAT THE FUNDRAISING
36: What It Takes To Be a Confident Fundraiser with Dethra Giles
This episode is sponsored by:
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“People act as if confidence is just this thing you have. Either you have it or you don’t. We don’t realize that confidence is really a spectrum that waxes and wanes, and we’re all born with it.”– Dethra Giles
Episode #36
Overview
In this episode of What the Fundraising Podcast…
I talk to Dethra Giles, founder, and CEO of ExecuPrep, an international performance optimization firm. Dethra is a professional networker. She calls the people that she networks with ‘employee-preneurs’, because she believes everyone of us is the CEO of our own careers. From the cubicle to the corner office, she’s the professional coach that will boost your self-awareness and will inspire you to lose the fear of thinking big the next time you’re talking to a potential funder.
“We fail because we think ‘yes’ and ‘no’ are our only options.”. One of the ultimate lessons of this episode is that a real partnership might actually start with a ‘no’. To overcome uncertainty and find alignment, she urges us to embrace our sense of ignorance. There’s a time to be ignorant and say ‘I don’t know’ and push ourselves to grow.
We also discuss the ways in which women often hurt the confidence of other women when we believe in a zero-sum game. There is more than enough for everyone, and Dethra urges us to start recognizing ourselves as creators and visionaries in order to make space for others.
Join in and listen to this conversation where we encourage you to aim high and take your fundraising and leadership skills to the next level with more confidence!
confident fundraiser confident fundraiser confident fundraiser confident fundraiser confident fundraiser confident fundraiser confident fundraiser confident fundraiser
Join in and listen to this conversation where we encourage you to aim high and take your fundraising and leadership skills to the next level with more confidence!
EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS
- 2:29 - Who is Dethra Giles? A business leader who wants to fix the consciousness of organizations all around the world.
- 5:21 - Embracing our ignorance: How to find the middle ground between risk mitigation and showing up confidently.
- 10:46 - Negotiation beyond a ‘yes’ or ‘no’: Thinking big and realizing where the negotiation starts.
- 19:40 - Questioning our skills: Understanding the relationship between confidence and impostor syndrome.
- 28:26 - Here for the unlearning: Overcoming self-beliefs around rejection and the need for ‘solid skills’ that aren’t helpful to acquire alignment.
- 37:34 - Make space for others, there is more than enough for everyone: Support and disempowerment among women and underrepresented groups in society.
- 50:00 - How to contact Dethra Giles and a shoutout to CASA and UNCF, two nonprofits that she’s passionate about.
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Dethra Giles:
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Tips and Tools to Implement Today
- Embrace ignorance: We usually give a negative note to this word, but the truth is that nobody’s born knowing. Ignorance is a time to accept, ask, learn and imagine.
- You have to know who are your partners (and who aren’t): Not everyone is designed to be your partner. The sooner you recognize that, the more both parts can move on. Your time is worth it.
- ‘No’ is where negotiation can begin: Building trust is often a long process. Every powerful opportunity requires some risk, so if you’re rejected, what matters is not the ‘no’. It's how you talk to yourself after that ‘no’. What do you say to yourself? And is there a way to move forward with the partner?
- Don’t be afraid to aim high: Some funders will actually feel honored if you ask for more than they can give. And you will never know if you don’t ask!
- Check out Dethra’s Confidence program: It has super useful resources like writing your Success File (that you’ll want to keep handy) to remain conscious about your own confidence skills. You can check it out at this link: https://www.dethragiles.org/confidence
FAVORITE QUOTEs
- “We walked this life being safe. And we're not being safe. We're being quiet. We’re missing opportunities. We’re being risk-averse.” - Dethra Giles
- “We fail because we think ‘yes’ and ‘no’ are our only options.” - Dethra Giles
- “We all start out uncomfortable. Embrace the discomfort, let it push you forward, and keep doing it until it becomes comfortable for you.” - Dethra Giles
- “People often say you are the sum total of the things that happened to you. No, you're not. You are the sum total of what you've made those things mean.” - Dethra Giles
- “We were meant to get in that seat and make space for others.” - Dethra Giles
- “We have to begin to create a mindset that was never given to us. We have to be creators.” - Dethra Giles
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I teach nonprofit fundraisers to bring in more gifts from the RIGHT donors… so they can stop hounding people for money. Fundraising doesn’t have to be uncomfortable.
- CEO & Creator of the Power Partners Formula™
- Disruptor in the funding sector, changing lives everyday
- Relentlessly committed to the movement of money into the nonprofit sector
- Focused on win-win partnerships that allow fundraisers to be authentic and empowered in their work
- Over 15 years working in nonprofits (managing director and ED of multiple fast-growth organizations)
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NON PROFIT SHOUTOUT
This week’s guest, Dethra Giles @dethra.giles, shares two nonprofits she’s passionate about! Court Appointed Special Advocates (CASA) and United Negro College Fund (UNCF).
Get to know CASA!
CASA envisions a world where every child who has experienced abuse or neglect is given the opportunity to thrive in a safe and loving home. This association works with state and local member programs, supports and promotes court-appointed volunteer advocacy so every child who has experienced abuse or neglect can be safe, have a permanent home, and have the opportunity to thrive.
Visit https://nationalcasagal.org/
Get to know UNCF!
The UNCF seeks to build a robust and nationally-recognized pipeline of under-represented students who become highly-qualified college graduates. This is done through a three-pillar strategy. Positioning member institutions as a viable college option for students and investing in institutional capacity to improve student outcomes; creating transformational support programs to ensure students are enrolling and persisting through college completion; building awareness of educational attainment and cultivating college-going behaviors within the African American community.
Visit https://uncf.org
episode transcript
